"Got a vessel that we've charted, into the wide open sea...

wow, i realize it's been over two years since my last post.

i'm not back....i'm still here.....

huh.

 

I tried out TrustFlow II for LiveJournal. The following people not on the friends list for anneh_le_pirate are close by:

• dabria, mahkia (50 - 100)
• berne, yumijimeru, vintageous, celtgurl, pegkerr, moocards, miss_minority, nemoorange, terroid, cutiepie_jordie (100 - 150)
• hereswith (150 - 200)

( More results below the cut... )

Created by ciphergoth; hosted by LShift.

TrustFlow II: Who is closest to your friends list?

tomorrow i leave for France.

*squee!*

it's not fair that i'm feeling so guilty. i mean...fuck. i've got to get over This.

Hm. France in four days and I'm losing my mind. Yesterday I planned to meet Catherine at the train station at 1 o'clock today to go downtown to do some $Xchanging (dollars to euros). Then late last night I realized that I don't really need to exchange here--I've got my checking account and besides if I want cash I can just take care of it in France. So I meant to call Catherine up this morning and tell her I wouldn't be joining her downtown but, uh, I forgot.

So 1 o'clock came and went and she called me at 1:07 wondering where I'm at and I'm like "....damn." Of course I explained and apologized profusely before hanging up, but, I mean, I feel like the biggest bloody shithead in the world.

And Pat keeps bugging me about his Hit for the Hospital event, which I didn't try very hard to find a partner for, which I'm not sure I ever wanted to do, but which makes me feel like a shithead all over again anyway, even though he got a little pushy about it yesterday at Kate's graduation party. But I guess I can't blame him--it's for a good cause.

Which means I have to blame myself.

And I'm still in the market for a job, as it were. No luck there, but is there ever?

Meg's party was fun. Memorable moments include being chased by a hefty jar of fat little cicadas, Sam Perez and cicadas, simultaneously happy and frustrating conversations with Ashley, and wild fooseball games that teetered on the edge of insanity--the majority of which were played with many members of Mr. Wetta's 2007 eighth period AP English class. Kate's was just as exciting. I ate too much, got recruited to play in a game of hide-and-seek by her little cousins, played volleyball (reasonably well), played basketball (not so well), was caught unawares by a flying volleyball thrice, and made a fool of myself with food and mess--can I say now that Pat picked a most inopportune moment to introduce me to his friend Will? My mouth was full of these really tasty chips and I couldn't talk--the event was both embarassing and funny.

So, despite aforementioned setbacks, summer thusfar has been grand. Wish I could write about some things in more detail, but busyness is not an item to deplore. Nope, not at all.

It's a big step, so I think it merits some sort of acknowledgement in this here journal of mine.

Mostly it just made me sad, though not for the reasons one might expect. At dinner my dad and I laughingly commented on how anxious and high-strung my mother acts during "big days" such as this, and my mom replied saying that she just has an idea of how she wants the day to play out, and when it's not going the way she always imagined it she gets upset. This I can understand, because I am exactly the same way. And she was upset that she got no pictures of me outside on the front lawn in my cap and gown, and no pictures of me with my friends after the ceremony, and--really--no pictures at all. And it's all my fault. It's my fault because I insist on skipping such customs which only seem silly and self-indulgent to me; yet I fail to think of my mother and how, though I couldn't care less, it is all very important to her.

I'm sorry mom.

On a slightly less-depressing note, I'm done. I've graduated, and the words taste foreign on my lips. But it's done, and that's pretty cool. I think the ceremony went well, though I don't think there was anything there worth noting, so...I'm very glad it's finally over. The nostalgia hasn't kicked in yet (thank God), so I'm very happy to move forward and begin daydreaming of a different life.

France in eight days.

Orientation on the fifth and sixth of July.

And note to self: Meg's Grad Party. Write about it.

Well I'm quite back from making my sister breakfast. At noon, no less--she ate breakfast at noon. I'm afraid the eggs were a bit over-cooked, and I even managed to break one of the yokes in the process of flipping the egg over in the pan, but I'm getting better; I can tell. She also had two slices of toast, and a cute little mix of blackberries, strawberries, and kiwi in a bowl that I made for her. I turned on the Garden State soundtrack while I was cooking, and then it was on while she was eating and I sat next to her with a book to read. Needless to say, she enjoyed it.

Beautiful morning.

I've removed the four extra blankets on my bed because now, even with both my windows open wide to the summer wind and the fan in the hallway on, the night is sweltering. And yet I love the first few days of summer--everything's so effortless and free--this is of course before the boredom sets in.

Now, besides practicing piano and getting a job and learning guitar and reading as many books as time will allow, I've got a goal this summer. And it's a good goal: I'll spend the summer before I leave for college learning how to be comfortable in my own shoes. Because I want to be confident and sure-footed next year. I will become both who I am, and the person I want to be. And I will be proud of her--whoever she turns out to be.

And, heh--isn't it strange? I can't remember exactly when I created this journal, but I remember posting about the first few days of my budding summer a year ago; I have been faithfully posting in this journal for one whole year.

Neat.

So I've seen AWE twice now, and after discussing certain points here and there at other journals and on msn, I think it's about time I sat down and tried to organize the full volume of my thoughts here, in my own journal. Thus, I hereby set forth my own attempt to make sense of two hours and fourty-five-or-so minutes of the newest Pirates canon.

EDIT: I've decided I'll have to focus on only one thing at a time, then come back later to discuss another aspect, as I'm so overwhelmed it hurts. so make sure you check back often for new ideas. Thanks.

( Cut for wordiness and spoilers and disorganized confusion. )

I think everything's going to be okay. I just talked to Meg and she said she's probably going to the 1130 show with Kathleen and do I want to come?

OF COURSE.

Ha, after getting permission to go to the midnight show I was afraid I had run out of friends to go with who were avaliable. But how could I forget about wonderful, wonderful save-the-day Meg?! I don't think she has any idea how happy she's made me; before I talked to her today I was utterly depressed when I thought I had no one to go with and would have to wait until Friday to see AWE.

And I went out and bought the soundtrack during lunch today. Meg, you're right: it is epic. And I'm crying. The excitement is mounting to a leve which I soon won't beable to stand. And I'm supposed to start studying for my math final. Ha.

Ha Ha.

So now I've realized I can't go to the eight pm showing of Pirates on Thursday because of the jazz concert.

Yeah.

What kind of a last week of school is this? Everything's all wrong--I'm too busy and still have WAY too many responsibilites, and fuck, when do I get to do what I want to do?!

SCREW EIGHT-PAGE WETTA PAPERS! AND JAZZ CONCERTSSSS!!!

And I'll blame stupid fucking Disney while I'm at it, since they couldn't wait for July to release the third movie like they did with the other two. The money-mongers. Gah.

GAH!